Empty Nesters

We are now officially and literally empty nesters. Thirteen days after the eggs hatched all four have flown the coop. The first one left around 10:45 last night. We had just returned from our first ever wine tasting and we saw one of the little guys on the deck. As we approached to get in the door he jumped off the deck and into the grass. We tried to catch him to put him back in the nest because evil lurks in the darkness but we could not get him. The other three were all hunkered down. This morning as we were leaving to go grocery shopping the other three were looking eager to leave. When we got back home they were all gone. They did leave us with a parting gift, as you can see it is a blob of bird poop. So that saga appears to be over I will return you to your regularly scheduled programming.

Nine Days Since They Were Eggs

For those paying attention it has now been nine days since the Robins eggs on our front deck have hatched. The eyes have opened, they have found their voices, pin feathers are turning to full fledged feathers. I imagine it won’t be long till we come home to an empty nest. When I first saw the nest I didn’t think they had a chance being where it is. look where we are now.

Day 1

Day 9

Five Days Later and the Birds Thrive

Five days have passed since the Robin eggs have hatched on our balcony. I honestly did not expect them to make it this long as the nest is very exposed to predators and the elements. But here they are in all their glory.

Wasps and Bears and Birds Oh My

It is spring here in Happy Valley. We have more than mice, wasps and bears. This robin’s nest is on the railing of our front deck. They hatched this morning and it now seems to be dinner time.

What Doesn’t Kill Me…

So I’m getting older. Yeah I know, what are the alternatives? In my head I don’t feel old but my body tells a different tale.

Sure I identify with those posts of Facebook. Yes I was born before we had home computers. I remember Television without a remote. I grew up in a world without a phone attached to my hip. And if you wanted HD you looked out the window.

But none of that is what I’m talking about.

I’m talking about struggling to finish one Big Mac meal never mind chowing down two like I did in the olden days back when a Big Mac was actually big. And what is with salt all of the sudden? Are they making it stronger? If I eat a Pizza I’m up half the night guzzling water and the other half is spent peeing. I used to order whatever I wanted and the more the better, now if the picture on the menu looks like it has too much food I order something else.

Back in the day I was captain of the relay team many years in a row. Now I don’t run. Run? Who am I kidding I don’t even bend. Two weeks ago I threw my back out removing clothes from the dryer.

At work we have bakers racks where we put equipment. There are four sometimes five shelves to a rack. I’ve never put anything on the bottom two shelves lately even that third has become daunting.

Socks! Don’t even get me started. It is not the socks so much as the feet. I’ve never been a huge fan of feet. But who in their right mind put them so far out of reach of my hands? I need a nap after putting on my socks.

And what happened to all the actors and actresses? Growing up all the stars were older than me and I could look up to them. Now all of them are so young, exactly when did the scale tip? But as young as they are, that doesn’t bother me nearly as much as Doctors. Doctors are supposed to be older more experienced wiser people. I really don’t like Doogie Howser telling me how I should live my life. (Google it)

I remember my father who used too, (still may) lie down after a shower while he was still wet. He would tell my mother, “I’m drying” Dad, I understand. I really do. I’ll stay in the shower a little longer to delay the drying process.

There are advantages. Sex for example is wonderful, especially the one in the winter.

I’m 47.

Ahh Karma, Where Art Thou? Oh, There You Be.

We went to see the latest Star Trek movie.

We like to sit in the very last row of the theatre. We were the first to arrive and we took our usual seats. We watched as a family of five walked in and sat directly in front of us. Really? There was nobody else in the theatre! They could not sit at least one row in front of us. When dad and teenage daughter leaned back the back if his chair was touching my knees. My wife commented on how rude they were and we got up and re-located a few seats down.

The theatre never filled up.

As the end credits started to roll the five of them left. A few minutes later the two adults came back and were looking on the floor and between the seats, obviously they lost something. We also saw the kids looking threw the trash.

karma is such a wonderful bitch.

And Then Came the Wasps

In my last sermon to you we discussed bears. But this week has proved that there are worse beasts out there than the bears. There are wasps. Not the regular run of the mill outdoor wasps. No, we are talking about the dreaded indoor wasps. That’s right we have indoor wasps. The first one I found buzzing around the window. No problem probably followed us through the door when we got home. I trapped him with a paper towel and set him free. The second wasp? eh, he too may have entered when the door was open. He was a little more aggressive and I had to catch him with a cup and show him the door.

The third. well I was watching the television when I heard my wife, whom we know runs yelling barefoot at agitated bears, screaming like a little girl “A Wasp, Another Wasp!” I thought for sure she had been stung to elicit such a response. But no, she was not wearing her contacts and she picked up what she thought was some cat food off the counter but it turned out to be a fuzzy buzzing wasp. Both woman and wasp survived the ordeal. But I started to get the inkling that we had a problem.

The next few wasps were found in our bedroom. At least they are easy to find. Just watch the cats when they start leaping at the walls and ceiling we pretty much know Where to find the wasps. So far nobody has been stung and no wasps have met their end. We have determined that they must be coming from the light fixture in our bathroom.

At least we know what my next project will bee.